Category: Food

kale + tofu balls with pasta

Published on by Lan | MoreStomach30 Comments

kale + tofu balls with pasta

when i lived with my grandparents
school let out before they got off work
i went to an after school center
where i received tutoring for my homework
or i played with other kids in similar
situations
on occasion this place would
take us on field trips
one such field trip was to the local
roller skating rink
i was not a klutzy child,
not more than the usual
actually,
i was quite coordinated at sports
but put round wheels on my shoes
and it was a mess
i fell on my ass more times
than i was standing
and no lie
the next day i could not poop

now,
there is potential scientific
and/or medical proof
that falling on your rear from
roller skating impedes your
daily constitution
in fact
my dear friend Nuria
& i discussed it
something about bruising
and all that
so there is a correlation
between the poop and roller skating
plus, that’s what gpa told me
and i believed him

kale + tofu balls with pasta

i’m still a shitty
roller skater
and ever since
my colonoscopy a few
years ago
i’ve been very meticulous
about what i eat
there are always greens in the house
i always reach for the kale
or spinach
or beet greens
or collard greens
or mustard greens
anything verdant
when at the markets
because pooping is important

and that’s it for the TMI stuff

kale + tofu balls with pasta

kale + tofu balls with pasta
this is an updated version of my original recipe, with actual exact measurements!!

note: i have a soft spot for baby greens: spinach, kale, arugala/rocket. they’re more tender and honestly, cuter. any greens would be fine with this recipe, i’ve made it with dinosaur kale before and it turned out fine. also, i’ve made it with regular firm tofu and it was fine too.

makes about 22 golf-sized balls, with pasta serves 4-6

2 containers of extra firm tofu (28 oz), excess water squeezed out, i use nasoya
1 carrot (about 1.8 oz) minced
1/2 red onion (about 3 oz) minced
5.5 oz baby kale, rough chopped
3 cloves garlic, divided & minced
1 tsp red pepper flakes (optional)
2 TBL nutritional yeast
3 TBL panko flakes
8 TBL olive oil, divided
3 TBL parsley, minced
pasta of choice

first squeeze out as much water as you can from the tofu blocks. i normally wrap them in a clean kitchen towel and put a heavy bottom pot filled with cans to weigh it down on top. if i plan ahead i do it the night before, or i leave it on the counter while i do other kitchen duties.

get your mise en place in order: wash, skin and mince carrots. mince the onions and garlic. rough chop the baby kale.

heat 2 TBL olive oil in pan, medium high heat. add in the onions, garlic and carrots, saute for a few minutes until softened. i generally shoot for the onions to get translucent. season with salt & pepper. turn off heat and quickly add in the baby kale. the residual heat will wilt it down. set aside to cool.

in a mixing bowl, crumble the tofu. you’re aiming for pea-sized crumbles. add in the panko flakes, nutritional yeast, red pepper flakes if using, and sauteed baby kale mixture. with your hands mix everything together. season again with salt & pepper. you’re going for texture here. depending on how much water was squeezed out of the tofu, you want to be able to form/mold balls. you may need to add more binding, like water, or add in more noosh or panko flakes to soak up excess moisture. just remember, you’re going to fry up these babies, too much water or too dry, and it will not work.

form your balls.

in the same pan, heat up 1 TBL of olive oil. carefully fry the balls up until golden on all sides. i was able to do this in two batches. keep the balls warm by putting on cookie sheet lined with a paper towel in the oven, set at warm.

meanwhile, cook up the pasta according to package instructions. i used linguine.

while the pasta is cooking, in the same pan you used to saute the vegs and fry up the balls, heat up the remaining olive oil, on medium low. you’re not aiming to get it scorching hot. add in the final minced clove of garlic and warm through. when pasta is cooked to liking, add it to the warmed garlic oil and toss to coat. add in the parsley.

divvy up pasta in bowls and top with kale tofu balls. BAM!

kale + tofu balls with pasta

red pepper & baked egg galette

Published on by Lan | MoreStomach21 Comments

Red Pepper & Baked Egg Galettes

i must tell you:
i’m all laze bones right now
this time of year,
the beginning that is,
is all about fresh gung-ho-ness
for resolution fruition
instead
i’ve got nothing for you
so lemme go ahead
and tell you a few things
and we’ll call it
catching up

|| i’m walking around with glasses on because now that i’m married i don’t have to look cute i’m getting my eyes ready to get lasik surgery’d. i’m shitting myself scared so positive vibes please.
|| a few weeks ago, just before the polar vortex, dw & i sat down and marathoned the Following. the new season begins on the 20th and i’m already pooping myself scared. there’s a lot of scared pooping this month.
|| we finally booked our honeymoon, set for the spring, and I’VE ALREADY DONE CHECKED OUT. there’s still WEEKS till the trip and i’m useless in everything right now.
|| i am mad crocheting for a foodie penpal thing i signed up for way back in November, when i was in the thankful and gift giving mood, and now that it’s time to send stuff, i’m stresssssssed that my stitches suck. this is why i so rarely gift yarn stuff — because of the pressure!
|| our favorite local pho joint is shutting down for TWO MONTHS, to vacation in vietnam for the winter. the fact that winter is the best time to enjoy pho is lost to them; but i really can’t blame them because it’s hot as shit in the motherland. again, why do i not winter in the southern hemisphere?
|| i have been discussing the reasons why i am so not offended by the likes of one Miley Cyrus and how i have been listening to her new song over and over and over again, that i might as well just plop down good money & download her album. update: dw downloaded it for me! party in the USA… i don’t have a good respectable answer, i just know that i’d like to have brunch with her, while telling her that she needs to put her tongue back in her mouth and trim her finger nails.

Red Pepper & Baked Egg Galettes

speaking of brunch
this dish
is from the Jerusalem cookbook
dw gifted to me
last month for my birthday
i caress thumb through it every night
and daydream about the
mediterranean-arab-israeli dishes
i could make for him
it’s his favorite cuisine
whereas it’s something
i’n not that familiar with
the spices
the combinations
the preparation
but despite all that
i’ve managed to make quite a bit
of the recipes already
one i’m still tinkering with
and will hopefully showcase eventually
think chocolate doughy goodness

anyway
i won’t write out the recipe,
which you can get here
instead
i will tell you that
in lieu of the sour cream
i used so delicious’s almond milk yogurt,
which i mixed with a splash of lemon juice, garlic & salt&pepper
for the puff pastry, i used pepperidge farm,
which is not organic but is pareve, meaning it’s dairy free

Red Pepper & Baked Egg Galettes

what up with you?

coffee chocolate chip ice cream

Published on by Lan | MoreStomach21 Comments

Coffee Chocolate Chip Ice Cream

i know it’s january
i know that it’s inappropriate
and very unseasonal
to talk about cold treats
like ice cream
i have no excuse
i have just one pic to share,
the lighting is shit
but i just had to tell you about this ice cream:
i’m usually huddled
under a blanket
when i shove spoonfuls
of the stuff in my face
i’m also usually
lamenting that my ass
CANNOT take anymore
if i don’t run soon
and yet
the stuff is here
in january
not july, not even may
when the blush of summer
is creeping
no
it’s here
and i fear
i will need to run marathons
this year
to keep my ass
a decent size
so dw doesn’t leave me
just kidding
the man is instigator
to all things glutton

here’s to the 2nd day of 2014
freezing our asses off
being pigs happy
and already fucking up our resolutions

coffee chocolate chip ice cream
*note: once you have a solid custard based recipe, play around with the different flavors. i had to use up some yolks i had laying around making this cake, i ended up with 6 yolks but methinks 5 is or even less would be just fine.
*all the other coffee ice cream recipes i looked at made use of powdered/instant espresso which i don’t have and i wasn’t about to go out to buy. again, play with the flavors, if the flavors don’t work out, add chocolate chips, it’ll save the whole concoction.

2 1/2 cups of lactose free half & half, i use organic valley
1/2 cup strong coffee, my mini-keurig contraption only brews 3/4+ cups at a time, so i boiled it down to half cup
1/2 scant cup sugar
6 egg yolks, 5 or even 4 would be fine, i had to use them up or chuck them
1 tsp vanilla, optional
1/2 TBL potato starch, corn starch is fine too
1/2 cup mini chocolate chips, i used enjoy life

brew up your coffee, set aside 1/2 cup, or boil it down for a more intense flavor, set aside.

to make custard, pour 2 cups of half & half into small sauce pan, with the sugar. on low heat stir until sugar is dissolved. add in the coffee, raise to medium-high heat and heat up the liquid to hot, stirring consistently.

in bowl have your yolks ready. with a ladle carefully pour a small amount of the hot liquid onto to the yolks, stirring with a whisk. this is called tempering, to avoid scrambling the yolks. if need to, add another ladle full, again, stirring constantly. pour the warmed yolks into the sauce pan with the rest of the hot half & half, keep stirring on medium heat. you want the liquid to thicken and get all custardy. there are tips/tricks out there to know when the custard is done, i typically stop when i’m tired of stirring and i have other things to do. this works for me, it may not for you.

with remaining 1/2 cup half & half, add in the 1/2 TBL potato starch and vanilla. mix and then add to the custard and stir some more. this will get super thick. remove from heat and allow to cool, preferably a few hours or over night.

when ready to make ice cream, pour into maker and churn according to machine’s specifications. in the last 5 minutes add the chips.

serve right away or allow to harden a smidge in the freezer.

boom.

my other ice cream concoctions:
peppermint chocolate chip ice cream
coconut anise ice cream
mint chocolate ice cream
strawberry & coconut milk ice cream

Caribbean Oxtail Stew

Published on by Lan | MoreStomach20 Comments

Caribbean Oxtail Stew

and lookie here
it’s the end of the month
the end of the year
in 48 hours time
twenty fourteen will arrive
and with it
goals
ideals
declarations
promises

i suppose in order
to ensure i keep my
resolutions
i ought to say them out loud
to be kept in check
be held accountable

ok
here goes:
|| read more. i love reading, i need to do that more
|| run again, my booty needs it
|| travel, with my husband. obvi
|| attempt ONE dinner party. even if we all end up sitting on the floor

2014. let’s do this.

Caribbean Oxtail Stew

caribbean oxtail stew
adapted from saveur
*note: before we moved into my condo, as we were moving out of dw’s apartment he introduced me to a Trinidadian restaurant around the corner. i was pissed. because the food’s amazing and it’s within walking distance and he’d never taken me before. we haven’t been back in a long time, this is very similar to a trinidadian oxtail stew.
*call around to your local butchers or favorite grocer to see if they have fresh oxtail, grassfed being the best.
*this is a fatty dish, have a salad on the side to cut through the richness. then run a mile or so.
*the original dish calls for carrots, brown sugar and Worcestershire sauce, ingredients we had every intention of adding in the last hour or so. but we forgot. we were busy watching the Following.

canola oil, to brown the oxtail
3lbs oxtails
salt/pepper to taste
3 TBL homemade tomato concentrate
1 TBL ginger, minced
6 cloves garlic, minced
2 large onions, rough chopped
1 rib celery, chopped
2 TBL flour
4 cups homemade bouillon/stock
1 TBL whole allspice berries
4 sprigs thyme
1 generous tsp of habanero paste, or 2 habanero peppers
cooked wild rice, for serving

season oxtails with salt & pepper
in a dutch oven or heavy bottomed pot, over medium high heat, heat up the oil and brown the oxtail to your heart’s content. go for a deep color. transfer to plate, ignore.

into the pot add the tomato paste, ginger, onions and celery, saute until soft. add in the flour and stir until smooth. just make sure the flour’s all gone. add the oxtail in again, along with the stock, allspice, thyme and chiles. bring to a broil, then reduce heat to low, cook for about 3 hours. i may have let it go for 4 hours, until meat is tender and falling off the bone. check seasoning.

serve atop wild rice.

Caribbean Oxtail Stew

minty snow cake

Published on by Lan | MoreStomach23 Comments

Minty Snow Cake

at the risk of sounding anti-climatic
my experience with christmas has historically been
lackluster
there is just something
very undramatical
about my childhood of christmases
until about 10 years old
we never had a tree
and when we did start
i wasn’t allowed to decorate it
what with my lack of artistic spacing
and ornamental picking ability
along with my stepmother’s anal
Type-A desire for
uniformity and beauty
tree decorating is a skill i never learned
in fact,
i am so bad that the one
time i attempted to decorate a tree
as an adult
my then boyfriend took all the shit down
and redecorated the fucking thing
hashtag Eff Off Xmas

it should not be surprising to know
then
that we don’t have a tree
nor do we have any other decorations up
with the exception
of a few wedding slash thank you slash holiday
card obligations
the days have been business as usual
but there’s been cake
a minty snow cake to be exact

so, from us,
ones who don’t celebrate christmas
wishing you & yours
a delightful week
have cake,
be merry

Minty Snow Cake

Minty Snow Cake
adapted from cook’s illustrated, but published on epicurious, cus i refuse to pay a membership fee to the former site

*note: i ended up doubling the recipe, i was hoping the layers would rise enough to slice in half but they didn’t. my end result was three layers, the fourth layer is being consumed separate. the recipe i post will be single.
my adaption is lactose-free, and for one of the layers i used liquid egg whites which made the cake batter watery-er and it didn’t rise as much as the layers with actual egg whites. the taste is the same though.
also, cook’s illustrated is legendary with their method on time, ingredients, blah blah blah. ain’t nobody got time for that. mix accordingly to common sense, bake based on how you know your oven, not on how far your pans can be from the wall and from each other. i’m just saying. hashtag this is me being ornery and eye rolling at CI.

2 1/4 cups (9oz) cake flour, plus more for dusting the pans
1 cup whole milk or in my case, lactose free half&half, at room temperature, i use organic valley
6 (3/4 cup) large egg whites, at room temperature, or Abbotsford Farm 100% liquid egg whites
2 tsp peppermint extract
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 3/4 cups (12 1/4oz) granulated sugar
4 tsp baking powder
1 tsp table salt
12 TBL vegan butter, softened but still cool, i use earth balance vegan buttery sticks

preheat oven to 350F & prepare 2 8″ round pans

in the mixing bowl, add the flour, sugar, baking powder and salt. cream with the butter. it’ll look like sugar cookie batter. scrape down the bowl.

in a pouring vessel, best is a glass measuring cup, add in the half&half with the egg whites, along with the extracts. mix until blended.

pour half the liquid into the batter, mixing until well incorporated. scrape the sides of the bowl often. add remaining liquid and repeat mixing and scraping. pour batter into the prepared pans.

bake for 27 – 30 minutes, until the cake pulls from the sides of the pan smidge, it’ll be a pretty golden on top and a toothpick will come out clean. cool on rack.

i used a typical buttercream recipe, of vegan butter + powdered sugar + a few splashes of peppermint extract.

i used these methods & inspiration for attiring the cake.

for more pretty cakes.